The recovery process begins here…*deep breath*

Regardless of the fact that this is a quasi-public forum and therefore quite accesible to future potential employers, I’ll admit it: My name is Thomas and I am a slacker.

As a slacker, my usual approach to any project at previous jobs has been to do it just quickly enough to avoid arousing suspicion. Usually I have minimal responsibility and the boss tells me what to do. I get it done, of course, but slack as much as is possible without jeopardizing the work facade. Charm, humor, and my carefully cultivated look of vague pedantic-ness have served me well as my most effective shadow tactics. Parents, managers, bosses, piano teachers, even professors have fallen victim to it.

But my job is so very different now. My slackerdom is in **severe crisis**

First, I’m supposed to decide for myself what to do all day and how to do it. Huh?

Second, I’m working directly with clients and alot of the stuff I tell them can be boiled down to the tenets of anti-slackerdom: set goals, make plans, try hard, be confident, etc.

Finally, most disturbing, my boss is a professional career counselor who treats me like a client. So instead of periodically poking her head around the cubicle to ask for the latest TPS resport, she schedules weekly supervision sessions with me and expects me to go over my “progress”. In detail! She makes action plans, uses bullet points, and asks me questions like, “where do you see yourself in five years?” And she is persistently perky, unbelievably upbeat, crazy nice ALL THE FREAKING TIME.

ARGHHHH the whole experience is so unnerving, so difficult in exactly that way that growth experiences tend to be…it’s a good pain. Kind of like yoga.

I still wish it would go away.
I wish I could zone out all day, watch Battlestar all night, and repeat.
But I can’t!


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